Is It Cruelty If I'm Just Being Honest?
By Sally Bishai (05/25/06)
Yes. If someone asked me for my opinion on how he or she looked (in a photo, for example), is it cruel of me to report that they resemble a pre-pubescent beast of prey who's considering making a run for it (rather than "Oh, how elegant and charming thou looketh, O friend, mine!")? Especially when I've seen him or her look so much better in other photos? Ok, then, what if this friend was a model, and I was going over her portfolio? (This may seem frivolous at first, but do keep reading and it'll make sense at the end, I promise.)
See, a person I know (with very fragile self-esteem, I might add) hath just recently besought my practiced and esteemed opinion, on a matter of aesthetics. (Yes, it was her Facebook profile.)
Now, gentle reader, thou knowest me well at this point in time! Thou CANNOT endeavor to believe that I would ever lead a young ‘friend’ astray in any way.
And thus, I informed the lassie that her looks did not fare well in the likeness she proffered me. And, in truth, I did curtail myself MUCH from confessing the truest truth of all, which was that she did resemble a distasteful hellion, fresh-caught from the pit. (And not in a good way, either.)
Aye, I do speak truth, gentle friend, I was seized by horror to see such (generally) decent, even pleasant (at times) features twisted and contorted, as a result of some alchemy or magic. (Or a too-close lens. Yep, that’ll do it every time..)
As it is, the wench cannot be called the most comely of maidens (I do hope she is yet a maiden, for she has yet to marry, and this proffered likeness of hers doth no large favors in such endeavors!), but this photograph doth confirm the sad fact, in harsher detail than one would be glad to witness.
I wonder... could it be the blind insistence of her own beauty that doth paint her in such unflattering light? Could it be her unfailing resolve that skews my perception so?
Perhaps. But if that were the case, then how could I have (earlier) praised other photos of her, not only to the sky, but to the very heavens?
Ahh, gentle youth. So fragile in its flowering and formation, so prone doth it cause one to be. To what, though? (To whit, to who, a merry note.. Ahh, do forgive me, for the hour is late and my digressions take me further and further from my point..)
To a refusal to open one’s eyes and see what peers closely at oneself? (And i don’t mean a camera lens, this time, although if the shoe fits..) To a thin-skinned insecurity that I must pander to? To a complete failure to grasp what is in one’s own hands?
Mayhap.
But that has naught to do with my predicament this night: SHOULD I, then, make amends with a lie? Or is my kindly-worded truth more helpful to my young friend, both in allowing her eyes to OPEN, and in my unwillingness to deviate from my version of the truth (thus cementing my underlying integrity)?
This I cannot say. Primarily, because deep thought on the matter would be a welcome addition.
But also because my friend is “unavailable now,” or, as her “Away Message” so blithely informs me, “Off taking more piccies of me from even CLOSER angles!!”
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