How I Stopped Worrying And Learned To Love WalMart
By Thomas Lindaman (11/20/03)
America is a land of opportunity. If people with no discernable talent like Al Sharpton, Carrot Top, Billy Ray Cyrus, and Tom Arnold can succeed, anybody can! (Well, except maybe for Dennis Kucinich.) But lately, a dark force has decended upon America, a force so diabolical that a conglomerate of Darth Vader, Satan, Bill Gates, and Mickey Mouse couldn't out-evil it. This mother of all evil has a name.
WalMart.
According to people on the left and the right, the nice elderly gentleman named Bob who greets you at the door is a part of a global plan to flood American markets with a wide selection of cheap foreign goods! Oh horror of horrors! How can we fight the evil that Bob represents?
Lately WalMart has been getting it from all sides more than a fat kid playing dodge ball. Liberals say WalMart hurts the working man because they don't have a labor union. Conservatives say WalMart takes jobs from American workers because they buy cheap products from overseas and sell them cheaply.
And I say they're both full of it.
The complaints about WalMart have more ulterior motives than characters in a Brian DePalma movie. Neither liberals nor conservatives hold the moral high ground on this and both are showing incredible amounts of stupidity when it comes to basic economic theories.
We'll start with the liberals' argument that the lack of a union at WalMart hurts the American worker. This is sheer absurdity because when you have a labor union, the employer will have to spend more money to keep the workers from striking. This cost gets passed on to consumers in the form of...higher prices!
I'm convinced that one of the reasons prices are so low at WalMart is because they don't have to spend money to try to quell a labor dispute. Instead, they keep the workers happy by giving them benefits and advancement opportunities. And whatever these measures cost gets made up for with volume. If anything, the fact WalMart does so much for the American worker at both sides of the transaction, be it internally or through product pricing, winds up helping the workers more than liberals want you to believe.
Now, don't think you conservatives have it any better. You guys are guilty of the same bad economic thinking that the liberals are. Your claim that American jobs are taken away because WalMart buys from overseas is silly because the alternative you propose, that being forcing WalMart to buy American products, will ultimately hurt American workers more than Cheese Doodles made in Taiwan.
The major problem with the conservative "solution" for WalMart is the fact that we don't make some of the products WalMart sells here. Ever try to find a DVD player made entirely in America? You're more likely to see David Gest and Liza Minelli have a baby together after a night of wild, passionate monkey sex. With this restriction, WalMart loses one of its selling points: a wide selection. Without selection, people will eventually stop going to WalMart, which means the company loses money, resulting in job loss. Funny how that works, isn't it? And in the end, you do nothing to help the workers on either side of the WalMart fence. Brilliant, and all wrapped up in a red, white, and blue flag to make you ignore the uncomfortable truth of the logical conclusion of the "solution" you propose.
I have a better idea. Instead of bashing Walmart for low prices, high selection, and great customer service, try to work with them to bring in more American-made products. And make sure that you're talking to the companies sending WalMart the stuff to sell. Let them know that you would prefer them to seek out more American alternatives. They may cost a bit more, but if you're wlling to pay a higher price for them, the companies would be fools to say, "No, we don't want more of your money. We'll just sit tight on what we have."
But the ultimate solution is so dirt simple even Al Gore on five bottles of NyQil could get it. If you don't like WalMart, don't shop there! But realize that with that choice, you're at the mercy of those whose selection pales in comparison. For example, I went to Target the other day to try to find transmission fluid. After looking all over for one and being ignored by the floor help as though I were selling white chocolate candy bars to raise money for Klan for Kids, nothing could be found.
Except for a full row of cell phone accessories in the automotive section. I'm still trying to figure that one out, folks. Then, I went to WalMart, found the transmission fluid in the automotive section (with no trace of cell phone accessories, I might add), and managed to get out of there fairly quickly. This impressed me so much that I've decided to stop going to Target unless they're the only place they have the item I'm looking for, and more often than not they aren't the only ones. It's that little extra touch that turns WalMart from ogre into hero.
I don't agree with all of WalMart's business practices because they represet a short-sightedness that could backfire on them. However, it cannot be denied that Sam Walton's dream has grown beyond the mere selling of off-brand potato chips to a multi-million dollar company that sells off-brand potato chips. And just like the SUVs and "Friends," WalMart will keep coming back not because of a lack of will, but because of a lack of brains on the ones trying to set price and product sale controls into an economy.
The former Soviet Union used to do something similar. Look how they turned out.
(Printer friendly version) Email: Thomas Lindaman
