If Terri Dies, Undeniable Damage Will Be Done!
By Debbie Daniel (03/23/05)
Oh, that we could all die of starvation! I’ve listened to Michael Schiavo explain - for the 100th time - how peaceful and painless the dying process is through starving. It would make one wish we could all die that way.
Scars are cutting deep into the fiber of our hearts as we are forced to accept the mantra, “This is what Terri wants.” I’m sorry, but I’m not buying any of it.
It may be painless for her, but I feel an agony of pain that I can’t shake off and I don’t know why. I’ve listened to both sides, but there’s enough reasonable doubt in this case to set the worst criminal free and I’m beginning to believe the criminal is Michael Schiavo, not Terri. Maybe he should lie there with her - receiving no food or water - and feel this painless procedure as she will.
And even though I believe Terri knows exactly what’s going on, she has no option but to accept her fate. She uttered the words, “I wouldn’t want to live like that,” after watching an emotional movie of a person on life support, and now those words will send her to her grave; no chance of a retraction.
We have to accept her at her word, and though she cannot speak in audible tones, we must believe that if she could speak we would hear her say, “Let me die, let me die.”
But when I look at the pictures of Terri Schiavo and the interaction with her family, those are not the words I see her saying.
In fact, after watching this “real life movie” played out everyday on the TV screens across America, don’t you get the feeling that if she had a chance to utter her thoughts she might want to say, “I don’t want to die like this.”
The only difference this time . . . she can’t talk.
“I would never want to live like that” is a natural response under ordinary circumstances of everyday living. But when faced with death, we are all fighters. It is then that the whole picture changes.
When I hear of people ready to run to lawyers and have living wills drawn up, I am fearful of what emotions can do in people’s lives. It’s a scary thought to know that the emotion of a tragic movie and even the emotion of this tragic scenario lived before our eyes would cause us to make a directive that we may one day be forced to carry out with no chance of changing our mind.
When you write up your will, how long will you give yourself to see that there is no hope? What will you measure that by? If we were all held to the words we’ve spoken or written in a wave of emotion, we might find ourselves on the other side of a devastating situation with no way out.
We could even be like many who lived to tell their stories and lie in a comatose state only to hear those around us make plans for our demise. You’d like to scream out, “I’m here,” but you can’t.
How many times have we looked at other people who might be disfigured or severely handicapped and said, “I wouldn’t want to live like that?”
And that’s exactly what Terri Schiavo was doing on that fateful night when she made a similar remark which has become her public declaration of death. Although her husband has said they discussed it at length, I question a 26 year old woman so fixated on how she would die.
Well, now the time has come when simply uttering such words could become your last will and testament and be considered an official directive of how you are to die. It gives one pause to know that the responsibility of what we say may very well become our death sentence.
I’ve tried to play out the scenario of Terri Schiavo dying in this slow grueling death of water and food deprivation and I can hardly bear it. I don’t even know this young woman but my heart is aching. So, I don’t know how her mother, father, sister and brother can stand it. For Michael Schiavo, it seems quite easy, but I would say that he has a definite conflict of interest, or rather, I’ll quote his words: “It’s okay to love two people at the same time.”
My mind takes me to Terri’s bedside where I watch the anguish and pain she must feel as day by day goes by and nothing is done to alleviate the thirst or hunger. She’s been use to the interaction of her family holding her in their arms, kissing her on the temple and stroking her forehead. What must she think as no one is by her side while feeling these horrific pangs of hunger and thirst?
In my heart, I believe she knows exactly what’s happening. And I don’t believe this is the way she wanted to die. The despair of being cut off from her family will cause greater damage than what’s done to her by denying food and water. That will be a death for everyone involved.
And we too, all of us, must stand by and watch it happen. Helpless . . . hopeless . . . you . . . me, and there’s not a thing any of us can do.
Victory for Michael!
Does it make you feel any better believing that this is what Terri wanted – that this was her desire?
When do we give up on people and say, “Okay, it’s time for you to die now?” How careful should we be in making comments like that around the Michael Schiavos of the world? I would want to be very careful before I signed any papers to end my life.
If we’re going to kill Terri Schiavo based on the circumstances of what she felt and said after watching a movie, then we might as well knock off a few others of us.
Was the person in the movie in the exact same condition that Terri is now? Was it a feeding tube? Was it a breathing machine? Were they also denied rehabilitation, speech therapy, and placed in a windowless room for five years - each situation is so different, how would you know?
How many times have husbands and wives told each other that they wouldn’t want to live if anything ever happened to the other one. So if both individuals are in a car accident, and the husband dies, should we refrain from using any kind of assistance because this was the wife’s wish? Should we deny her any right to life and try to save her, or do we let her lie in a bed, with no water, no food (since it’s so painless) and wait for her to die? What do we do?
So go ahead and get it written down in your living will so we won’t administer aid to save your life. If it is your wish to die with your husband, I guess we should stand with you alongside the road until you’re dead; a trip to the hospital would just take up bed space.
I’m sure all of this must sound harsh . . . but not nearly as harsh as what we’ve been expected to accept in this heartbreaking saga. And I can’t even imagine what Terri must feel.
The repercussions and reverberations of this story have already done great damage to all of us, and it will not soon be forgotten.
Be careful what you ask.
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